


Detroit: Become Human Text Fics (Ft. Ocs)

by IhasCat5



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Awkward Romance, Bad Pick-Up Lines, Crack, Crack and Angst, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Group Chat (Detroit: Become Human), Group chat, Memes, Mutual Pining, Oblivious, Oblivious Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Oblivious Markus (Detroit: Become Human), Pining Idiots, Post-Android Revolution (Detroit: Become Human), Post-Canon, Post-Pacifist Best Ending (Detroit: Become Human), Post-Peaceful Android Revolution (Detroit: Become Human), Romance, Soft Markus (Detroit: Become Human), Texting, i use bitch a lot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:08:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27765016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IhasCat5/pseuds/IhasCat5
Summary: Crack with some plot, featuring group chats and texts.This is technically written about my OC and Markus' relationship, but you could also read it as a named reader insert fic.
Relationships: Markus (Detroit: Become Human) & Original Character(s), Markus (Detroit: Become Human) & Original Female Character(s), Markus (Detroit: Become Human) & Reader, Markus (Detroit: Become Human)/Original Character(s), Markus (Detroit: Become Human)/Original Female Character(s), Markus (Detroit: Become Human)/Reader, Markus (Detroit: Become Human)/You





	1. And the Chaos Ensues

**Annika created 'Jericho'**

**Annika added Markus, North, Josh, Simon**

Annika: Hey y'all, I thought making a group chat for us might be good for us to coordinate Jericho stuff

**Markus entered the chat**

Markus: Jericho stuff?

Annika: I didn't know what to call it ok!!! I almost called it missions but idk that doesn't sound right. Words. They evade me.

**Simon entered the chat**

Simon: Well I mean 'missions' at least sounds better than 'Jericho stuff.'

Annika: fINE, bullies. Missions. This group chat is for coordinating missions

**North entered the chat**

**Josh entered the chat**

North: Oo missions, sounds badass

Josh: Sure

Annika: I see the man of few words has entered

Josh: Only a man of few words becuz the author is unsure how to characterize me ://

North: Hey can we change names in the chat

Annika: ye

**Annika changed 'North' to 'Bitch** '

Bitch: hEY

Markus: Be nice, Annika

**Annika changed 'Markus' to 'Dad'**

Dad: Really?? I don't even look remotely like your father.

**Bitch changed 'Annika' to 'Daddyslittlegirl'**

Simon: Kinky

Daddyslittlegirl: Are u kidding me

Bitch: N o

**Bitch changed 'Dad' to 'Daddy** '

Daddy: North, please

Josh: Hey, why isn't Connor in here?

Bitch: And I oop-

Daddyslittlegirl: being in this group chat would overload the sweet boi's circuits

Simon: Tru dat

Josh: Fair

Bitch: So, Markus, how that bill goin

Daddy: Hmm?

Bitch: Oh u know what Im talking abt

Josh: Yall are talking bout the android human marriage bill, right?

Daddyslittlegirl: Wait Markus?? Is this true???

Daddy: Yes, I've been working on it for a while. I think I'm pretty close to getting it passed. It was sUpPOsEd to be a surprise

**Daddyslittlegirl added Natalie**

**Natalie changed 'Daddy' to 'RoboJesus'**

RoboJesus: Ra9, not this again

Bitch: Ok Natalie doesn't do shit for Jericho why'd u add her

**Natalie changed 'Bitch' to 'MegaBitch** '

  
MegaBitch: EY

Daddyslittlegirl: She wanted to feel included 😥

RoboJesus: She does help North, lay off. Without her I don't know how we would've kept our people in shape while we were on the ship

Josh: Yeah, she put her life on the line to steal the supplies we needed

Natalie: That's right, guys 😌

Simon: Honestly it was kind of concerning how good u were at stealing stuff

Natalie: Shhhhhh don't blow my cover

Daddyslittlegirl: Fuck i just realized I can't change my own name

Natalie: I gotchya, gurl

**Natalie changed 'Daddyslittlegirl' to 'Markuslut'**

Markuslut: BeTraYal

Simon: ok but we changed the topic, what do you think of the android human marriage bill Annika?

Natalie: Ooo, tea 😚🤩😋😜

Markuslut: Its really amazing Markus, Im sure there are android human couples who will be very thankful for it

Simon: Coward

Natalie: CmoOON ANNIKAA

MegaBitch: Im so sick of u guys making googly eyes at each other all the time just fuck for Ra9's sake

Simon: Bold of u to assume they haven't

RoboJesus: I don't have a dick

Markuslut: I'd be concerned if u did

MegaBitch: Idk he might need to fuck an old man back to life

Simon: Or fuck the life out of him

Natalie: 😶

Markuslut: Jesus christ yall are dISGUSTANG

RoboJesus: You called

Josh: Did Markus just make a joke

RoboJesus: I thought if I embraced the Robo Jesus joke you guys would stop calling me that because it doesn't annoy me anymore

Natalie: Well we all know it still does so too bad so sad Robo Jesus

MegaBitch: Back to the dick thing, Markus, u know there are attachments right?

RoboJesus: Really?

RoboJesus: Well I guess Carl would never tell me that so

Markuslut: Yeah he did try pretty hard to set us up but not that hard

RoboJesus: He did ask me to double wash the sheets in the guest bedroom every time you slept over here though

Simon: Askkffhgh

Josh: Lol

Markuslut: Sounds about right

MegaBitch: What did he think u guys were fucking quietly or somethn

MegaBitch: Annika's virgin ass could never

Markuslut: U right u right

Josh: Carl was just playing it safe which I respect

Simon: Exactly

MegaBitch: Simon ik for a fact you make a mess when u jack off

Markuslut: tmi tmi tmi t M I

Simon: Yeah well you said u and you in the same sentence which makes you a mega bisexual

MegaBitch: Ur point, homo

Josh: Hey, we're all a little gay here

Natalie: Not me I'm straight af

Markuslut: Ha straighty

MegaBitch: Hetero

Simon: Dammit how did u break into our ranks

Natalie: By being super supportive 😌😉🏳️🌈

Markuslut: I did actually bring her to pride once

RoboJesus: Really, how'd it go

Markuslut: She enjoyed the drag race but she wasn't half as excited about sword fighting women as I think everyone should be

MegaBitch: Bro u gotta see sword fighting women? Where is this and how do I sign up

Markuslut: Finally someone who appreciates how hot that is

Simon: No I think she wants to be one of the sword fighting women

Markuslut: Oh yeah, smthn about like women doing Shakespeare or women putting on Shakespeare plays. Idk i don't remember look it up

Josh: Don't teach North how to sword fight she's scary enough as is

Natalie: Yes, please don't

Simon: She doesn't need to be taught she can learn it through a program. U should know this Josh ur also an android-

Markuslut: WeLl tHEN DON'T GIVE HER ACCESS TO THE PROGRAM

Simon: You really don't know how androids work do you

RoboJesus: I've taught her some things but there's some things she just doesn't get

Markuslut: Wow r u calling me dumb

Natalie: Oh you've taught her things, huh?? What kind of things 😏😏😏

RoboJesus: You can't see me right now but I'm facepalming

Josh: Can confirm

Markuslut: Oh are u with him rn? Where are y'all?

Josh: At Carl's house, I'm leaving in a bit though

Markuslut: Markus are you still gonna be there later today?

RoboJesus: Yeah, why?

Natalie: She's planning on askkffhjdtixryzpeyzeyoeyz

RoboJesus: ?????

Markuslut: It's nothing don't worry about it

Markuslut: Just being betrayed by one of my best friends

Natalie: SHE ATTACKED ME

Markuslut: :)

Natalie: MARKUS SHES GIVING YOU A GIFT BECAUSE SHE QDOHIFYITPS047PYE

MegaBitch: BEAT HER UP BEAT HER UP

Natalie: HEYYYYyyy

Markuslut: I will break y'all's kneecaps

MegaBitch: Try me bitch

Markuslut: Hey where'd Simon and Josh go

RoboJesus: Josh just left so I don't know

RoboJesus: Now what's this about a gift?

Markuslut: It's a surprise 😊

Josh: Hey guys I'm in a car now

Josh: Simon's with me but he's in stasis

MegaBitch: What? why??? He came with you to Markus's right?

Josh: Yeah he went off to the store but he didn't return so I was worried, and when I came back out he was crumpled on the doorstep all beaten up. Not sure what happened, but it looked like it was a group effort. He's in stasis until I can get him back to New Jericho to get him repaired

Markuslut: Ohmygod is he ok?? How did that happen??? I mean, Carl lives in the nice part of town---it just doesn't make sense to me

Josh: I think he'll be fine. There's been some organized anti-android crime recently, it might be a group

Markuslut: Like a group that's the opposite of Jericho? Shit

MegaBitch: I knew something like this would happen, fucking humans.

Markuslut: Unfortunately for every step forward there's pushback

RoboJesus: I'm sure things will work themselves out. If there really is an organized group, there's people we can report to to get it taken care of. But, let's not worry about it too much for now

Markuslut: We should talk to Connor about this

RoboJesus: That's a good idea, Annika. Josh, I'm coming over to New Jericho right now to see Simon

Markuslut: Natalie said she'll give me a ride there so I'm coming too

Josh: A ride? Why aren't you taking a self driving car?

Markuslut: Natalie share's Hank's sentiment of not liking self driving cars, she prefers to drive herself. So I might as well come with her instead of going separately

MegaBitch: And you trust her???

Markuslut: Hey, she's actually a decent driver

Markuslut: Anyway, I'll see you when I get to New Jericho, North.

MegaBitch: See u


	2. the Heart Emoji

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Markus and Annika text each other.  
> Set the day after the events of yesterday's chapter.

**Annika**  
Hey, sorry I had to leave yesterday.  
Is Simon ok?

**Markus**  
Yes, he's fine. Good as new  
thanks to Lucy.

**Annika**  
Phew, I'm glad. Um, I never had  
time to give you the gift yesterday,  
so is it ok if I bring it today?

**Markus**  
Of course! Meet me at Carl's house this afternoon.

**Annika**  
I miss you.

**Markus**  
You just saw me yesterday-

**Annika**  
I know, but-

**Annika**  
I just feel like with everything  
that's been going on lately, I  
haven't been able to truly spend  
time with you.

**Markus**  
I know, I know. I've just been so  
busy trying to keep negotiations  
going smoothly.

**Markus**  
But, I promise when I see you  
later today, it'll just be us, and no distractions.

**Markus**  
No work.

**Annika**  
Ok, Markus :)

**Markus**  
❤


	3. Oblivious

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Right after Markus sends Annika a heart emoji, she texts Natalie to freak out about it

**Annika**

*sent screenshot*

*sent screenshot*

**Natalie 😜**

HE SENT YOU A HEART 😭

**Annika**

IK ASKKGFFGGGH

**Natalie 😜**

So is he like, asking you on a date???

**Annika**

No, no! We're just hanging out-

**Natalie 😜**

Aww, I'm sorry :(

**Natalie 😜**

But, like, he tooootally likes you

**Annika**

Noo, he and North have like, a thing goin

**Natalie 😜**

Ughh, you're killing me. You two have been through everything together!

**Natalie 😜**

You're practically joined at the hip

**Natalie 😜**

Just tell him how you feel

**Annika**

Today?

**Natalie 😜**

Yes gurl!! Give him the gift, and say "I love you, Markus"

**Natalie 😜**

And then he'll be all like "I love you too"

**Natalie 😜**

And then you'll make out

**Annika**

Eyy I'm at 69%

**Natalie 😜**

aNNIKA

**Annika**

I'll try to tell him, but I'm not making any promises 

**Natalie 😜**

Please. Just please.

**Natalie 😜**

I swear he loves you too

**Natalie 😜**

And you can punch me if I'm wrong

**Annika**

Oh I'll do more than punch you

**Annika**

I'll cry a lot

**Natalie 😜**

Ok ok i get it. You just wuv him so much 😋❤

**Annika**

Shut up

**Annika**

Anyway, I have to go lol

**Natalie 😜**

Ooo, whatre you doing?

**Annika**

Going shopping. Then finding a nice outfit for my 'date'

**Natalie 😜**

Ahaha ok, text me if you need outfit advice. Good luck! 😚😋😉💞

**Annika**

Will do. Ttyl


	4. Humble Leader

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Simon tries to knock some sense into Markus (not literally)

**Markus**  
So, I'm seeing Ann today

**Simon**  
What, you're not gonna start   
with "how are you Simon?"

**Simon**  
Jk, jk. Yes, you're seeing Annika, and you're gonna tell her how you feel

**Markus**  
Well, maybe, but I don't know if it's  
a good idea. If she does like me  
and we start dating, then she'll be  
under constant blast from the  
media because I'm a celebrity of  
sorts.

**Markus**  
Not to mention there aren't any  
public android human relationships  
I've heard of yet.

**Markus**  
Plus, she seems to like Connor.

**Simon**  
Connor is also an android, and  
although he may not be a living symbol of hope and freedom   
like you, he's still quite popular  
in the eyes of the media

**Markus**  
I think you're blowing my  
importance out of proportion  
a bit-

**Simon**  
Sure. Anyway, I'm sick of u  
both being pining idiots so   
grow a pair of balls and tell  
her

**Simon**  
Don't take that literally you  
know what I mean-

**Markus**  
I get what you mean, I'm not  
Connor, bless him.

**Markus**  
Shoot, I lost track of time, I need  
to get going.

**Simon**  
How

**Simon**  
You have a literal internal  
clock, ur an android

**Markus**  
Don't ask. I'll see you at New  
Jericho later.

**Simon**  
Ok, good luck ;)

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to write something for DBH but didn't really have time because of school, so I compromised on a text fic. I'm having lots of fun with it so far, and I hope you enjoy reading :)


End file.
